Allegory of the Two Caterpillars

“Master, talk to us about love.” He asked. “I could not talk about love my young apprentice. ” I replied. “But why master? You are now in your eight year of relationship. Do not tell us that it is not love that binds you two together.” He insisted. “My apprentice, it is very difficult to talk about something that I thought I am not capable of.” I calmly said. “But master…”

it is very difficult to talk about something that I thought I am not capable of“Huwag ka ngang makulit! Master ka ng master diyan. Tuloy nagdudunong dunungan ako dito. Puwede ba, tanungin mo na lang ako tungkol sa sex?” Sabi ko sa nilalang na ito na nabubulagan sa pag-aakala na ako ang kanyang all-time mentor pagdating sa relasyon. Tama na ba ang walong taon para tawagin na ikaw ay isa ng alamat?

Kahapon nga di ko magets-gets and pinag-uusapan ng mga kaibigan ko tungkol sa higad. Ang kuwento, meron daw dalawang higad na nagtagpo sa iisang dahon. Sa pagkadami-daming dahon daw sa halaman na ito ay iyun pa ang napili nila. Wala silang paki-alam kung dalawa sila ang mag sishare eh sa tingin nila masyadong masustansiya iyung dahon na iyun na di nila puwedeng tanggihan.

Dahil sa kanilang likas na kaugalian, walang humpay nilang kinain iyung dahon hanggat sa maubos ito. (Iniisip ko na lang na may naiwan pa namang veins/skeleton o anuman ang tawag doon, iyung dahon kasi kung wala eh siguradong mahuhulog sila sa walang katiyakang kapalaran.) Nang maubos iyung dahon, humiwalay daw sila.

Napatunganga na lang ako. Walanghiya, threesome. Usong –uso na pala ito. Kinain at kinatasan pagkatapos iniwanan ng naging buto’t balat na lang. “Tange. Hindi threesome iyan. Iyung dahon ay love. Iyung dalawang higad bale ay nag-share sa dahon. Ibig sabihin, nain-love sila sa isa’t isa.” Sabi ng kaibigan ko. “So, naghiwalay sila ng maubos iyung dahon?” Tanong ko. “Hindi. Naghiwalay sila dahil natunugan sila ng isa pang higad.” Sagot agad ng kaibigan ko.

“Lintek! Ang labo naman. Ilan ba ang higad?” Tanong ko ulit. “Apat! “ Sagot niya ulit. “Nakup! Anu ba iyan?”

Di pa natapos ang kuwento. Yumabong daw ulit ang dahon (may regeneration power effect pa) at bumalik daw ang dalawang higad sa iisang dahon na iyun. Pero di na daw sila nagpahalata. Habang kumakain iyung isa sa north side ng dahon, iyung isa naman ay doon sa south. (Cute. Magtatagpo din naman sila sa equator niyan. At naka-69 pa tiyak ang dalawa.) Hahaha.

“Kelan ba magpapakita ang mga higad na iyan sa atin para mabalahibuhan na natin?” Tanong ko. “Magpakahigad din daw tayo bago sila magpakita ulit sa atin.” Sabi ni Igan. “Huh! Birds of the same feather flock together?” Hahaha.

“Master, do you think it is possible to love two persons at the same time?” My apprentice asked. “It is possible my young apprentice, but it could not be of the same weight. You would love one more than the other.” I replied. (Walanghiya. Balik na naman sa role playing.) “Master, puwede ba akong maging kabit mo?”

Wahhhhhh. Ayoko naaaa!!! Read more ...

Recycling

“I have a seven year old son living with my parents in the Visayas.” I told the stranger whose hand I place on my lap. What he is going to do next depends on how he puts an implication or interpretation on what I have just said. He could just back out now or proceed with his lust over me. I paused and waited.

Unruffled by my revelation, the stranger keeps his hand on my lap slowly caressing it. Maybe, I still need to fill in more information to his brain. The stranger could have not heard what I have just said. “My son would be celebrating his birthday soon and my mom is asking me to come home. The problem is I don’t have money for the plane ticket.” The stranger did not budge from where he is sitting. I think he is now digesting everything he was hearing. However, he is too slow.

I put my hand in his crotch. “Hey, this is big. You are one horny dude.” I tried to smile casually. “Do you come here often? My name is Rey. Would you like us to go to a private place? I could do whatever you want. I just need money to pay for my fare back home.” I squeezed his hard-on. I grabbed his hand on my lap and allowed him to feel my cock. “Are you game dude?”

It only took seconds before he removed his hand on my crotch. “I have a phone call. Excuse me.” The stranger scrambled out of my sight. “Yes!” I exclaimed to myself.

It worked. It really worked, again. Using a storyline that suggests solicitation is a big turn off especially in an inappropriate situation. I am sorry for the stranger but he has been annoying me and I need to get rid of him.

For several times, I have used this story to ward off unwanted people. It becomes part of my strategy of rejecting people, which occasionally I use. Be a liability to someone and be sure that no one will want you. It is some kind of reverse psychology actually. People would think that they are the ones who are rejecting me. By making up this story, the respondent would have time to assess the situation. They are able to make a choice and by making their own choice, he or she would think they are the ones who are in control.

The story is not original. I think it has several versions. People whose purpose is speculative have recycled it repeatedly. We have heard it everywhere, even on the streets. There was a version that I have learned from experience, I revised it a little and been using it just to determine how effective it could be and how people would react, and indeed people nearly respond differently.

Once I told this story to some guy I met. He went along with my story and invited me to his house. Before I know it, I was the one who fell on his trap. He juiced me right but was fortunate enough not to suck his dick. Another guy just brushed my story aside and continued sucking my dick until I came. When I asked him something about the story I told, he was clueless. Strangely, one really fell for my story that he offered his help even before something had happened between us. I declined his money in the end.

I am not a prostitute. I may suggest solicitation using that story but it is never in the intention of selling sex for money. My intention is just to avoid undesirable and annoying people, but sometimes people are just so insensitive or plainly dumb.

Devises of avoiding, rejecting, and resisting people abound my arsenal. I could use one or two or all but sometimes people could really be unpredictable. There is no such thing as a perfect formula that could be acceptable or appropriate for all people. Sometimes you could use the wrong one and suffer the consequences. Sometime you just have to wait and see for that nick of time when and what devise is necessary. On the other hand, if all goes out of hand, there is nothing left to do but just live the experience and adopt, learn from it, and then remodel the devise for future use. Well, I think that is what life is all about. Read more ...

At Least Once

“Gusto ko lumabas sa isang pelikula.” My roommate told me once. “Talaga? Sige gagawa ako ng indie film. Ikaw ang artista.” I jokingly replied. “Sige. Kahit anong role basta wala lang subuan.” I laughed very hard at his statement. He seemed very serious about the idea and I could even see that on his face. “Gusto mo ipakilala kita sa kaibigan kong director?” I suggested.

I am serious too. I have a “friend” who makes indie films. His name is Remus (Nude Photography 101 series). He was a creative photographer when I first met him, but these days he is becoming a successful indie film director. In fact, he has already received some international awards considering that he was just a film student the last time we met. I told him that he would become a good filmmaker someday. I predicted right. Lucky bastard. 

Remus texted me to get my photoset from the two photo shoots we made. We met at the Araneta Center and ate first before proceeding to his place. I was not expecting this because I thought he would just hand me the photoset at the meeting place. Knowing that we would be going to his apartment, I ready myself to all possibilities.

The place is not an apartment. It is a three-storey house. He has his own entrance to the house. When we entered his room, I immediately conclude that a true artist owns it. I could also see a vast collection of dvds and a personal computer. His bedroom looks like his working area also.

Remus asked me what I would like to drink. I told him that bottled water would do. He returned with what I am asking. A residence with a 200ml bottled water? That is a surprise.

I sat on a low-rise stool at the center of his room, while he on the computer chair. We continued updating each other. He asked me if I am still with HB and I said yes. He then suggested if he could shoot the both of us. I told him I would have to ask HB first. He said that he has an idea of his new project and that HB and I can pose as twins. The project is still nude.

There was still a formal air in our conversation and I think Remus felt it too. I guess this is because of what happened in our last photo session. The truth is I still have this weird feeling that he would attempt doing it again. My guess is turning right.

“Have you tried watching Asian blue film?” Remus asked me. “No.” I lied. Remus stood and went to a stack of dvds inside a box. He picked up one and inserted it on his computer. I sat there watching his every move. The video played.

There was a lad taking a bath. He was lathering his body. The camera caressed his slim and lithe body, following wherever the soap is moving. When the lad’s hand reached his cock, he stroked it gently until it gets hard. The lad was in ecstasy, moaning. The camera then shifted its focus outside of the house. There was another lad with knees bent trying to peek through a hole. Panning the camera down, I could see the voyeur’s hand pulling his own cock up and down.

A new sequence cuts in. It was an oral sex scene of the two lads previously shown. The voyeur is sucking the bather’s cock. The cock is long but thin and the voyeur is trying to suck the cock all in. I could see the bather’s face in a state of ecstasy, and I am having a hard on too. I shifted my dick inside my jeans. It was in an upright position already and I could feel its head against my abdominals. Suddenly, I could feel hands on my shoulder blades.

Remus was gently massaging my traps. He was good at it so I let him do what he was doing. I just continued watching. The scene on the monitor continued to sizzle. There were already three men alternately sucking each other. The two lads were joined by a matured muscled guy. They were worshipping the body of the latter. I thought I could get my rocks off right this minute.

My legs were getting cramps so I stretched them out. My body followed the stretch and I was glad that Remus is at my back preventing me from falling. Unfortunately, the movement lifted my shirt up exposing the head of my cock. I am sure Remus saw it. I returned to my position.

How long could I refuse myself from opening my zip, take out my cock, and jerk it? How long Remus could fight the temptation and give me a blowjob? The answer did not take long when I felt a long and hard shaft grinding at my back. It was Remus cock. Yeah, he is horny as hell but I am not comfortable in what he is doing. I noticed that Remus is shifting on my side. He did the grinding of his cock again on my face. That was a turn-off. I grunted my disapproval.

Mistaking the sound as a moan, Remus began to hold his hard-on from his shorts and rub it on my face. It really starts to piss me off. However, since I am in his home I could not be disrespectful to him. I need to put on some courtesy and reject his way of advances politely. I looked at him, smiled a little, and said, “Ayoko.”

I have turned him down once on the night of the shoot in the presence of a third person. He thought possibly that the situation inside the privacy of his room would turn to his favor. Unfortunately, it did not. The single pronouncement of refusal prevented him from pursuing his intention.

“Salbahe mo. Dalawang beses mo na ako tinurn down ah.” He said. “Kunsabagay, di naman kita puwedeng pilitin. Lasingin na lang kita next time.” He laughed. That was a relief. I thought the event could turn sour. He turned the porn off and looked at me again. “Ipakita ko na lang iyung ginawa kong short film sa iyo.” He said.

He enrolled in a film course in UP. I asked him what he would do about his photography. He said that film and photography complements each other. He just wanted to get to a higher level about his art. I believed him. Remus is a very ambitious guy. He told me once that he was seeking a photography scholarship in Europe. I guess he was not able to get it so he turns to film instead. After showing me his short film, I praised it and told him that he would go far of his dream.

Before I left his house, Remus handed me my photoset card. He told me that the offer with HB still holds. I thanked him in return and shook his hand. I feel that the handshake is an affirmation of mutual respect.

People have desires, wishes, or dreams. Some do come true and others do not. However, failure or rejection should not prevent us from pursuing the dream. If we must fail, then we must move on. We might not be successful in a particular one, but we could always look for other dreams. Our reality provides a variety of options and we are lucky that we could always choose one, and then another one.

My roommate is an engineer but it does not mean that he could not venture into the performing arts. It is just a matter of rediscovering ourselves and we could always do anything, at least even once.
Read more ...

WordWatch: Fabulous

Too gay! I meant no offense. It is just that the first thing that comes to my mind whenever I heard the word is the five gay connoisseurs of the “Queer Eye for Straight Guys”, the fivefab. With this in mind, I am starting to associate this word to “gayness”. Yeah, I know.

I was chatting with an online friend a while ago and we are talking about his annoyance with his “PLU” friends. He said that all three of his friends, except him, are already in relationships and it irritates him that whenever he asks them to go out they would ask permission first with their respective boyfriends. Nevertheless, he well understood the situation so he mentioned that he is “looking for single fab PLUs to hang out with”.

“Single fab PLUs”? I smiled at his preference. I thought of the “fabcaster” bloggers and I suggested them to my friend. I suggested it because I thought the “fabcaster” is rooted from “fabulous”. Unfortunately, he reminded me that he is already detached to the blog world.

“What is fabulous?” I asked him. I even told him of the impression I have with the word, “rich and fashionable”. He said that it is not necessarily. “These are people who know what they want, people who live without consequence.” The description made me think and so I asked.

“Fabulous” is a very familiar word but it is not in my vocabulary. The truth is this is the first time I am using it. Instead, I use other adjectives like “awesome”, “wonderful”, “marvelous”, “excellent”, and the interjection “wow”. “Fabulous” never comes to my mind, surprisingly. And so, out of curiosity, I thought I need to check it out in the dictionary to have an affirmation of the right definition.

fab•u•lous ( f²b“y…-l…s) adj. 1. Barely credible; astonishing: the fabulous endurance of a marathon runner. 2. Extremely pleasing or successful: a fabulous vacation. 3. a. Of the nature of a fable or myth; legendary. b. Told of or celebrated in fables or legends.

Other synonyms are: splendid; wonderful, marvelous, extraordinary, awesome (informal), brilliant, bully, excellent, fantastic, heavenly, mind-blowing (slang), stupendous, super, superb, superlative, terrific, wondrous.

Going back to the “fabcaster” and my friend’s definition of fabulous, I believe that that word is use in their own contexts, or possibly used as a noun. The former may use it to describe their manner of broadcasting or the group who is making the broadcast and the latter an attitudinal pattern or mindset observed from a group of people. To me, on the other hand, I would still associate it to the celebrity or showbiz lifestyle.

To use or not to use? I guess this would be the first and the last time I would use the word in my point of view. Nahhh. It is just a preference. ;) Read more ...

BlogNotehings: This is my blog

We always emphasize that blogging is our way of expressing ourselves. It is our online diary of all “that is” under the sun. May they be expressions of our political stand, our personal relationships, our outdoor activities, our social realisms or just our trivial musings, our blogs represents part and parcel of our minds and hearts. It is never to impress anyone.

Jaycee: do u hve ur political blogs?
Jaycee: can i read it?
Trip: i dont have a political blog.
Jaycee: ok tnx
Jaycee: can i visit ur page?
Jaycee: wats the url
Trip: justforthetrip.blogspot.com
Jaycee: gve me the complete url;
Jaycee: para clik ko nlng
Trip: http://justforthetrip.blogspot.com
Jaycee: ]oh my
Jaycee: its a diary
Jaycee: hahah
Trip: do u know what blogs are?
Jaycee: "i guess your blogs are boring for your age"- jaycee (president of ------ student council)
Trip: its ur opinion. Hehehe

Jaycee has been a chatmate since I started blogging. He has been to all of my blogs before. Although he is not that diligent in following them, I have not heard of him complaining about them. I rather see him as a nonchalant guest of my blog, after all it is not really my blog that interest him.

Jaycee is an advertising student. As I remember it, they won some award in an advertising competition. I complimented him for that. He or they must be good. However, reading his comment somewhat surprised me and respectively attaching his signature as a student council president is uncalled-for. I even see it as a mockery to the reputable position.

I am not an advertising or marketing person. I do not have the theoretical background on how to sell my blogs and I do not conduct feasibility studies just to determine how my product would fare in the market. What I know on the other hand is that advertising and marketing are designs to affect human behavior, and what discipline can explain and understand it better than the science of human behavior itself?

Man is motivated by two human instincts, life and death. This is where love-hate and sex-aggression dichotomies emanate from. Where hate and aggression propagates death on one hand, love and sex propagate life, on the other. My blog, this blog, is all about sex, sexuality, and relationships. It is the most basic of all human needs. SEX SELLS, no matter how one squirms about it. That is the reality of life.

Sex knows no age boundaries. From the time that humans are born, sex is already one of his/her definition, and sex accompanies him/her until death. This is the main reason why sex is never an irrelevant entity to humans. Thus, I choose sex to be the theme of my blog. It is interesting. It is relevant. Most of all, it cuts across all boundaries.

We are our blogs. They may not entirely define us but they are parts of the whole. If someone criticizes them, we feel it. That is pretty natural. Criticisms usually make us think. Sometimes we would get so affected that we would momentarily halt whatever we are doing and consider some decisions. On the other hand, critics can give all the opinions they want. That is all they can do anyway. These are still our blogs and we can do whatever we want with them.

We create blogs because we thought that they are of interest to us. How could it be a boring thing if it is something that is interesting? Isn’t that a contradiction? Read more ...

Sex Mate

I could just brush it off but it really amused me that I took a picture of the ad as a souvenir.

Guess what part of the ad tickled my funny bone?

You don’t have any idea? It’s the age of the “matrona” he prefers, from 60 to 70 years old. Hehehe. Would you still consider this female age group “matrona”? The hell, they could be our grandmothers already! And what kind of a man would like to make out with these old women?

Is Hayden a lesser "evil" of the two? :) Read more ...

Running and Bumping

The alarm went off at exactly 4 o’clock in the morning. It was raining outside and the first thing that comes into my mind is the question, “Would the run be postponed because of the rain?” I grab my mobile phone to ask our running coordinator. “The run will proceed rain or shine.” He replied to me.

I wake HB up. He stretched a little and opened one eye, squinting. Before he could ask whether the run will continue despite of the rain, I showed him the text message from our coordinator. Convinced that he needed to hurry, he stood up and went straight to the bathroom.

It is customary that I would get a quick shower before the run, but this time I did not. The weather got me cold feet, literally. I thought that it is redundant to have a shower at home and get wet by the rain outside. I could save up on water too. We are joining this Earth Run anyway. Also, we have a ride to catch up at 4:30. I put on my running outfit and while waiting for HB, I boiled up some water for hydration. I also made an energy drink for HB and me.

We arrived at the event area fifteen minutes early. We brought our bags to the baggage counter and checked ourselves in for the run. Runners in either blue or red jerseys are already filling up the area. Nevertheless, I am guessing that the crowd is not that big compared to the other runs I previously joined. This is probably because there are two other running events taking place simultaneously today. I told HB that we still have time to warm up.

While doing the warm-up run, I spotted a familiar face. “I thought I just saw a blogger.” I nudge at HB. “Where?” HB asked. “The guy we just passed by.” I replied quickly. He turned his head to catch a glimpse of the person I am referring. “Why didn’t you say hi?” HB asked. “I am not sure if I am right.” I replied.

We stopped at the row of portalets just behind the stage. Another familiar face greeted me just one person ahead of me. He is the guy who have approached me at the ULTRA swimming pool. He recognizes me too. Silently and discreetly, we have acknowledged each other. I turned around and faced HB. “I know the person with the eyeglasses six o’clock of me. He approached and chatted with me once at ULTRA.” HB looked at the direction but did not react. I turned around again. The guy is not looking already. I guess he already knew that I am with a company.

HB and I entered the portalet together. That could be a statement to the ULTRA guy who I have noticed has not left the queue to the urinals after he finished off. Our eyes met again.

The gun went off thirty minutes late. I ran the 5k event learning that the trail would be the McKinley route. I knew it is difficult. One thing more is that, I have not been running lately. Badminton was my focus for the last three months and I do not want to risk myself with the 16k without preparation. I reach the finish line in less than what I expected and received an extra t-shirt. HB was a couple of minutes behind me.

“I saw your ex.” HB told me. “Really? So he joined also.” That was only my reaction. I saw whom HB is referring when I saw the “ex” passed the finish line.

Acquaintances and ex’s are sometimes reasons for misunderstanding between couples. Couples are not always that secure with each other that mere sight of an unknown acquaintance or ex would become the source for jealousy. The world is just but a small world. Coincidences and accidents happen at random and being caught off-guard could spell disaster.

I am transparent with HB. As much as possible, I told him of people I have relation with, ST, LT, and ONS alike. I do not want that from nowhere, a person would just run or bump into us and spill some sensitive materials. I find it best that HB knows everything about this so he would be able to respond properly when uncomfortable situations would come to happen. This is the reason why HB is well- secured about me and I am glad that I successfully make him feel that way.

Eight years is very well earned. I guess. Read more ...

Sex, Lies and Videos

Sex seems to be the most embarrassing activity or behavior one might consider that we do not want others learn how we deal about it. We avoid talking about it with others, and if ever that we do, they must be our closest friends.

---

“What are you doing there at the backseat, Trey?” My boss asked from the driver’s passenger seat. I did not reply immediately so he continued. “Are you jacking off back there?” He and the driver both laughed. A little surprised by the remark, I remained silent.

What the hell is he talking about? I asked myself. Is he trying to break the ice between us? Yeah, I am still new in the firm. Maybe he is trying to make an impression of how cool and casual he can be with his subordinates. Yet cool he is not. I feel like it is harassment. I could file a sexual harassment charge against him, right.

---

Questions about sex could be a source of embarrassment. Would you not lie if someone asks you if you find two men having sex with each other a complete turn on? What if there are grounds for that particular question? If you were a married public figure or a respected officer, then you would lie. You would deny everything that would compromise your marriage or position.

---

“Trey, how would you delete the URLs in the history of Internet Explorer?” My boss asked while handing me his laptop. I looked at him questioningly. “My brother borrowed it and told me that there are naked pictures of men in my laptop. I told him that it was borrowed so many times that I don’t know who browsed such stuff.“ I took the laptop to show him how it is done.

Yeah, I saw those naked pictures. I even showed them to my friend. “Now I know why your boss keeps on making sex jokes on you.” He laughed. I just sneered at him and recounted another time when my boss stripped naked in front of me while we were on a fieldwork.

“Trey, you did borrow this laptop several times. Have you seen the photos, or were you the one who visited those sites?” He asked. “If I did, there would never be a trace boss.” I replied bluntly. How dare he?

---

Videos like pictures are good proofs to counter the lies and denials people make. With all the gadgets available these days, it is easy to record the most embarrassing moments of people. With digital technology, it is also very easy to disseminate or distribute data globally. It would only take enough guts and motive to do a destructive video.

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This is the perfect timing. I am doing a massage on my boss. The red indicator of the camera is on. The recording is in progress. My boss did not notice it. How could he if he is so preoccupied on what is happening. I let his hand rest on my lap. I am pulling his arm in such a motion that he could touch my erection. What I am waiting now is when he would hold its full length. But I could not wait any longer.

I keep his hand rest on my raging hardon while I continue stroking his arm. I adjust my position so he can grab my cock easily. My flimsy boxers did some help because it allowed my cock some freedom. I could already feel that he is stroking my cock slightly. That is my cue. I carefully guided my boss’ hand on my dick and let him hold it. I heard him sigh and moan.

I glanced at his cock still covered by his white briefs. It is already throbbing and there is a spot of precum at the center. I move to touch it. He moaned and suddenly grabbed my dick tight starting to jerk it up and down. I shortly stopped his hand to expose my cock from my boxers. He grabbed it again without any prompting.

Next and final stage is how to get my boss’ lips touch my dick and eventually give me a blowjob. He is already in ecstasy. His mouth is open, panting. His hand is busy with my dick. I inserted my hand in his underwear and grabbed his erection. I followed the rhythm of his hand on my dick. He made a guttural sound and is now pulling my cock hard. I could blow my load very soon but I should stick to the plan. I moved closer to his shoulder and lifted his head. He will give me a blowjob. My plan is unfolding. Tomorrow he will be at my mercy.

I looked at the camera. It is still rolling.

---

The plan never happened. There is no sex video involving him and I. Things do not call for that. There is no need of blackmailing a guy who only wanted some cheap thrill. I know that he likes men, me even. But taking advantage of a married Christian man is something that I could not just do. As of now, I could still tolerate his innuendos. Maybe time would tell him that I am that person who needs a little respect and he has the decency to show it. Read more ...